This is my worst fear, EVER
A 5-year-old girl fended for herself for days while home alone with the body of her mother, who apparently succumbed to bacterial meningitis, authorities said.
Police forced their way into the rural home about 45 miles northwest of Grand Rapids on Sunday and found the cupboards open, rice and cereal spilled all over, and the bathroom sink overflowing.
The body of Tina Tietz, 39, was on the couch in the living room. Her daughter Marissa had rummaged the house for food for an unknown number of days. The family dog was tied up inside.
Michelle Schnotala, 39, drove to Tietz’s home Sunday to check on her friend after not hearing from her for several days. They last spoke Feb. 3, when Tietz complained of a headache and ear pain, Schnotala said.
The house was locked, Schnotala said. “I heard the dog barking and Marissa crying,” she said.
“She just kept saying ‘Mama’s sleeping, Mama’s sleeping,’” Schnotala said. Mother and child lived alone.Marissa was examined at a hospital and is in the temporary custody of the state human services department, agency spokeswoman Karen Stock said Tuesday. The dog was taken to an animal-rescue organization.
A preliminary autopsy found that Tietz likely died of bacterial meningitis, an infection of the fluid that is in the spinal cord and that surrounds the brain, Muskegon County Undersheriff Dean Roesler said.
via the San Francisco Chronicle.
“Mama’s sleeping. Mama’s sleeping.” OH. MY. GOD.
It’s really all I can do to hold it together. In fact, the only reason I’m not curled up and sobbing in the fetal position on the floor right now is because Killian pooped his pants right after I read the article.
After my mom died, I used to think think that my worst fear was my dad dying. I got married and my worst fear became Joshua dying. I had a baby and my worst fear became something happening to my baby. Now, as Judah’s growing older and I’ve had another baby, my worst fear is something happening to me - in front of my children. Of me dying - slipping getting out of the shower, the lift in our building failing while I’m on it, getting hit by a car crossing the sidewalk, my heart exploding inside my chest or something, and they’re left to fend for themselves. That fact, no matter how depressed I feel, is what keeps my from killing myself - leaving my children behind with me lying dead somewhere. It’s what keeps me going.
I sometimes wonder what would happen if I died and no one else was around but my children. Judah doesn’t even know her numbers, she wouldn’t be able to call 911! And even if she did, so what? What’s a three-year-old gonna tell the dispatcher? Mommy’s asleep? I have visions of Judah prodding me, saying my name over and over, and of Killian, who would have rolled over on his stomach and gotten stuck, screaming because he’s hungry with a dirty diaper and wondering why I won’t come get him. The fridge would be open and all the applesauce and cheese would be eaten. Judah would have overflowed the toilet with too much paper and the place would be a disaster. The only person I talk to every day is Joshua, so no one else would even have a clue what had happened (though I suppose five days without a photo post would cause some to wonder where I was).
“Irrational,” you say. “Your children wouldn’t be left for five days in a house with your rotting corpse laying on the couch.”
Probably true, but that’s the way fear works, it doesn’t have to be rational, IT JUST HAS TO SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU.
February 13th, 2007 at 8:17 pm
Goodness! I’m not sure which affected me more: Your statement that you get depressed enough to think of killing yourself, or your mentioning applesauce and cheese (prompting a major craving). And once Judah does learn “911″, they’ll send cops to your house when they receive a call, no matter what she says (or doesn’t say).
February 13th, 2007 at 8:52 pm
Well, it does get bad, but please, LET ME REITERATE, I would never - I lost my mom when I was younger - NEVER do that to my children of my own accord.
I might be crazy, but I’m sane where it counts.
Applesauce and cheese are probably two of her favorite foods. All the yogurt would be gone, too, and the Cheerios, if she could figure out how to get them off of the top of the fridge.
February 13th, 2007 at 10:49 pm
If it’s any consolation… it’s twenty till one on the morning of Valentine’s Day, and I’m still up because I woke with a start when I had the horrifying thought that if a tornado suddenly hit here like it did in New Orleans recently, I might not have enough time to get my son to safety.
There’s a balance to be found, I’m sure, between being laissez-faire in regard to our children’s safety and being paranoid (and I am SO not claiming to have found it). The fact remains that we are protective of our adorable little snot-and-poo factories by design… so we do all we can do, and then we pray that God will do what we can’t.
Then we check the baby monitor again…
February 14th, 2007 at 2:37 pm
whoah. first off, let me say it would be really horrifying if your heart exploded in your chest. second, something would have to happen to both you AND joshua simultaneously, so even if your heart did explode (again, YIPES), joshua would be home soon, and he would ensure get the cheerios off the fridge for judah and keep the toilet from overflowing. and this might be a weird thing to say, but say worst case, and something awful and inconceivable happens while judah was too young to call 911-i bet she’s also young enough to block the memory. so, maybe that helps?
i feel you on the irrational worry though. i too am pro at it. i used to worry about my mom getting hit by a car (since she would go in to deliver babies in the middle of the night), now i worry about danny getting hit by a car on his way to and from school when he’s up late on projects. and when i’m home i worry about my cat being dehydrated and not eating enough for her little weak livered hyperthyroid 16 year old body. so i worry that i will worry too much if/when i have kids.
but worrying means you care, right? so, like getting older, it’s better than the alternative (not caring, not, not worrying).
February 14th, 2007 at 3:20 pm
I have totally had this fear, having heard similar stories that made me weep! (and still do sometimes). But usually God sends angels- which means, if GOd is telling you to go check on someone, go!