Now that I have your attention, I’ll bore you a little bit. A few weeks ago, I began having this pain “down there” whenever I lifted my left leg. At first, I thought it was because I hadn’t been getting enough sleep and perhaps slept on it funny one night. However, it didn’t go away. It waxed and waned - one day it was better, the next, not so much.
I actually began to think something was seriously wrong over Easter, when I didn’t sleep well because the pain kept me up all night - anytime I rolled over, it was excruciating, to where I could barely move my legs at all - and hurt all day, to where I couldn’t get off the couch at one point.
The next day, I called Dallas and spoke with a midwife at the birth center, and told her what I was experiencing. She immediately calmed my fears - which were that I was over-exaggerating what was happening, or that I was being a hypochondriac (wait, isn’t that kind of the same thing?) - by telling me that what I was experiencing is (ruling out a UTI) called pubic symphysis dysfunction. The symptoms match exactly what I’m feeling.
I had my first appointment at the birth center here the next day and told the midwife about it, and she agreed with the diagnosis. Pregnancy hormones help the body’s joints loosen, which enable moms to carry and deliver their babies. Apparently, for some women, this increase in hormones causes things to shift too much and can separate the pubic bone. One side is higher than the other. That’s what’s happening. And it hurts. Like. Hell.
The only thing you can really do for it is seek chiropractic care. So we have. I had two appointments last week and one today. It still hurts like hell. The visits offer some relief - mostly in the form of “well this side is this much higher than the other, but I got them level for now,” so I at least know what’s going on with my body. I don’t think the therapy is holding. I’ve been given instructions - put a pillow under my right hip and lay flat for five minutes, several times a day, don’t cross my legs, don’t cross my ankles, get into the car by sitting and swiveling, not putting one leg in first, get up evenly, sit down to put on pants and underwear, ice the area 2-3 times a day, drink more water, cut out coffee….
Still hurts like hell. It hurts constantly. It hurts to sit down, to stand up, to be in the process of doing either one, it hurts to lie down, it hurts to walk, to squat, to reposition myself, to pick up or carry Judah, to go up and down stairs… It’s hurting right now, as a matter of fact.
It’s getting to the point where it’s wearing me out emotionally, to be in constant physical pain. I can’t do the things I want to do, I can’t take care of or play with Judah the way I would like to. Everything is a physical chore. I woke up yesterday, couldn’t roll over or get out of bed, and just started crying. I don’t sleep well because ever time I move, the pain wakes me up.
At my appointment today, my chiropractor told me she would like me to come back this week. She said she would actually like to see me three times a week since I’m in so much pain, until my body begins to take to the adjustments. I told her that we looked at our accounts and could not afford to go more than once a week (I had gone twice last week). She said I really need it and I told her I understood that, and agreed with her, but that it was not financially possible right now. She said she didn’t think she could start giving free care, and I told her that I was not asking her to, but the reality is that even though I need this, I can’t pay for it, so I won’t be able to come. She said she can’t control what I do at home to keep the adjustment. I told her I’ve been doing everything I can. She’s been great so far about giving us a financial hardship price, but I felt a little guilt-tripped. I can’t just make money appear out of nowhere. We still have bills to pay and groceries to buy, too.
What if I don’t take? What if I’m in this much pain for the rest of my pregnancy? Now there’s a thought that makes me want to crawl into bed and not come out. So I was pretty upset after I left the office this morning. I felt like the visit didn’t end well and that there wasn’t a resolution to payment or scheduling. I’m not really sure what to do at this point.
Anyway, I know this is long and boring and slightly whiny. I’m in a lot of pain, constantly, doing everything I can to minimize it, and instead of receiving encouragement, felt like I was reprimanded for not having money. So please, I could use some encouragement.